130 I am The Lap

I am The Lap!

Now that I am retired, I have trouble getting started in the morning. I have art projects, writing tasks, and many little things around the house that need to be done.

I get up at a not-too-early hour and have to pull Tootsie, my Jack Russell terrier, out from under the covers. She needs a trip outside and I need breakfast.

Once that is accomplished, someone is waiting for me by our special dog chair—it has plenty of room for two!

Before I can become The Lap, I must gather all essential equipment—morning beverage (usually diet coke), tablet to check all the news, book, any recent writing to edit, and, of course, Tootsie’s blankie (also known as an old towel).

I may have created this. When we got the big T, she was 7 weeks old. I slept in a chair with her on my lap for about a month. We would go out as soon as it was light and then go back for a little more sleep in the chair.

So Tootsie is not a morning person, I mean, dog. She does turn into a crazy dog in the evenings. 

She brings a toy and barks until you throw it. If you ignore her, she will shove the toy under a piece of furniture, the television table being her 
favorite--when the TV is on, and then bark, bark, bark, bark and more barking until you use the specially designed toy-retriever (a cane) that is kept next to the special dog chair to pull out the toy.





But that is the evening nut, not the a.m. cuddler. In the morning, she expects to be covered with her blankie. 
If it is not available, she will start pawing at your clothes, looking for something to cover her.



It is not entirely one-sided. Research has shown petting a dog or having one in your lap reduces blood pressure, anxiety and depression, triglycerides, and heart rate. Spending time with pets activate the hormone oxytocin, which produces all those 
good physical effects. 

There is even research that suggests having a pet can produce a stronger immune system and protect against certain types of cancer. They also encourage more exercise among owners, but not in the a.m. in my house!

Since I have been drinking my beverage, I am always the one who must break up the morning cuddle. I am not sure how long she would stay in The Lap—I always break first.

I could be more assertive and let her nap alone, but I do enjoy a long morning snuggle—especially on a dreary, cold day.

                                                               Trish

Perhaps I am ever so slightly being bossed by a 15-pound tyrant?

129 The Circus

The Circus--2016 or Where Can I Run Away To Now?

What a year we have just had! 2016, according to some pundits and dictionary editors, is going to become a word in its own right. 

“Wow! That was a 2016!” The nearest meaning I can give “ a 2016” is “surreal.” Synonyms for “surreal” are bizarre, uncanny, and strange. And, yes, I think 2016 was a bit of all three synonyms!

So far this past year, among my blogs, I have written about the deaths of so many noted people, about my favorite New York City places closing, and I am adding now the end of the circus after 146 years. Trump won the presidency; the Cubs won the pennant. It is a bit strange to me that all these events occurred in 2016. I recognize we are an aging population and that to everything there is a season, but I will remember this as a “surreal” year.

This photo of elephants at work is only one of the reasons that Clyde Beatty – Cole Brothers closed its tent flaps and why Ringling Brothers & Barnum and Bailey announced at the end of 2016 they will finish their animal-less tour spring and close up shop, too. Some 30 elephants were killed “in the line of work” in the 30 years. 

Ferocious cats have lost eyes. Circuses have been indicted and found guilty and fined for lack of care of the animals, for improper handling, rampant TB among animals, no veterinary paperwork, and the use of these prods to make animals behave as the handler wished. [Nasty looking thing!]

One entertainment executive said that people no longer are thrilled by acts that were considered dangerous (“death defying”) – trapeze artists, and lion tamers, for example. 

Even if you never saw them perform, the Flying Wallendas were a recognizable name - a family of high wire artists from the 1920s until recently. Generation after generation became part of their family act. Each generation, however, lost 3 or 4 members by falling to their deaths. No nets, they said.

We can see these death defying actions on TV or our iPads at will. Watch America’s Got Talent and see all sorts of contortionists, acrobats, clowns, and high wire acts.

Another issue for the circuses is the railway costs. Moving from city to city by rail has been the tradition. During WWII, Franklin Roosevelt felt the morale of families needed the circuses in the towns and allowed them to continue using the rails. A prohibitively expensive transport now.

There have not been sideshows with freaks since the 1960s. Where they still existed, they were often shutdown or criticized in the local press. Freak is not a politically correct term – and it should not be. For sure, these folk were exploited.

I offer my guess that the circus is no longer relevant. It was the stuff of dreams. Small towns in the 1920s -1960s got the most entertainment they could possibly get from the “circus coming to town.” 

The circus was one of the first venues that gave women equal billing. Beautiful, bedazzlingly-dressed young girls swinging on trapezes, riding elephants, and jumping off and on the backs of horses was a whole new world. Ernest Hemingway said the circus “is the only spectacle …that has the quality of a happy dream.” No longer.

Along came the media age--TV, movies, video games, and the internet took precedence – enthralling youngsters as the circus once had done. Then there is the societal concern over the animals. No Jumbo--fewer circus seats filled. Lots of conflict about the ethical treatment of animals!

IF you still really, really want to go to a circus there are a few options left. California has its “steampunk” circus – Circus Vargas. It is said to be a plethora of goggles and gadgets. The Zoppe Family Circus is from Italy and the performers are sixth generation. Lots of clowns, jugglers, and audience participation. A family show! 

Finally, if one can afford it, follow Canada’s Cirque du Soleil. It is the global enterprise with touring troupes who perform in major cities. Each of the shows has a theme and/or tells a story. Pricing per seat is from $40 to $155. Oh, yes! If you are off to Russia, the Moscow State Circus is still producing two different shows – one with animals and the other is more a political story with acrobats, high wires, etc. 

In spite of these few offerings, there are still circuses - but, these to my mind, are not what we recall from our past or what we historically call the circus. “To everything there is a season….” 

FAREWELL! Glenne        

128 Mother-daughter bond

Debbie Reynolds & Carrie Fisher

A famous mother-daughter duo both passed away within days of each other. Shocking this country and probably the world. A documentary, “Bright Lights,” became available at the same time which sheds so much light on the relationship.

Debbie Reynolds and Carrie Fisher were not the typical run-of-the-mill mother and daughter – both, of course, were famous in their own special ways as actresses, entertainers, singers, dancers. And they never stopped performing even to their dying days.


The bond between the two of them was inspirational as well as unbelievable. Most of us daughters don’t have the opportunity for such a relationship with our moms due to many circumstances. Often distance is a problem as the miles separating us can’t be overcome with a physical presence. Plus immediate family obligations take center stage as they should.


But these two ladies managed to stay co close until both their lives ended abruptly. It seems so tragic but after watching “Bright Lights” about their lives, it seems appropriate. Try to see this program as soon as you can.

The two lives were so intertwined in so many ways, and the son and brother, Todd Fisher, helped to keep them running smoothly in all their many escapades. They even lived next door on the “compound,” as they referred to it. It was a rather quirky place as it was depicted in the documentary which made their lives all the more interesting with historic items from the entertainment world a part of their everyday lives.

I wish I has seen the TV special before their lives ended, but maybe I wouldn’t have paid as much attention until their almost simultaneous deaths. The show added a depth of understanding of why the two were so very close. Both were so talented and so clever that it was a given that they were be revered and mourned after their deaths as they were before.

So many family relationships are depicted as quite the opposite, especially of the famous brand, where mothers, daughters, sisters, brothers, and others are estranged and hurl insults and nasty jabs at one another. 

One touching scene was when Carrie was taking care of her father, Eddie Fisher, who had left the family for another actress which made headlines many years before. She was very tender in her care of him even though there had been many difficult times with the family, involving drugs and addiction. Again that shows true love, forgiveness, and understanding of this family.

Debbie and Carrie appeared to say whatever they wanted to each other with a great deal of love and compassion. They didn’t sugar coat their feelings but had them out there for all to see.

It makes me miss my mom and wish I had more time with her to talk, laugh, and share, but my mom left this world in 1998 about this time of year. She was ready to go after an illness that she tried to ignore. There are many times I want to call and ask her about something she knew, and I wish I had paid a little more attention to the details.
I urge all of you if you still have the opportunity, find out all you can from your family members --- they won’t be here some day.

I am reminded of a local mother-daughter duo that were also very close—they ran a local restaurant and lived in the same house. It was very entertaining to see the interaction daily between the two at the local diner. Not sure of their exact ages but they nearing the senior citizen stage. They also died in a short time frame from each other – one in July and the other in September of the same year. There must be something about the bond that affects the life expectancy.

Debbie and Carrie were lucky to have each other every day for so many years in such a close relationship. It is fitting that Debbie followed Carrie in death for she probably could not have survived without her, and it would have been the same for Carrie. 

It is such a loss for the rest of the family especially Carrie’s daughter. Her memories of these two amazing women must sustain her in the days and years to come.

Can you imagine the havoc those two are causing in the afterworld! 

Keep it up ladies.

Frances

127 Ad questions

Advertising Questions

Just some recent ruminations . . .

Hoarding or Shopping?

I confess--I have stopped to watch a few seconds of the hoarding shows while channel surfing but cannot bear it for long because my skin starts to crawl. As someone who has confessed to occasional "recreational" shopping, these horrific scenes come back to me when I peruse the store aisles.

And TV commercials push shopping as gratification. Some are subtle; others are not. She's "NOT SORRY" she bought every boot offered on the online site.

And "Momma Needs Something New!"

Do adults really believe Santa is going to bring them a luxury car?

Ad Spokesmen

The new Dos Equis guy has no appeal to me! The Mexican beer company sent their last "most interesting man," 77-year-old actor Jonathan Goldsmith, on a one-way trip to Mars in his final commercial and brought in a new one.

That seems a bit more classy than KFC who seems to be playing whac-a mole with their spokesman Col. Sanders. I think they are now on number six. Different ones keep popping up all the time. Perhaps they see it as a running joke. Except there was a real Col. Sanders--Harland Saunders, the founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken. His statue is still in my store!

Hey you Toyota, AT&T,  and Progressive spokeswomen, you too can be replaced--just like the Maytag repairman. 

What about Aaron Rodgers?

The Green Bay quarterback has been the spokesman for State Farm for 6 years. But you will also see him on Pizza Hut and Dr. Pepper commercials. With all that moola, he must love the game to keep on taking the hits!

New Year's Weekend & Football

How can one survive watching all those collegiate and professional games in one very long weekend?

By watching the commercials!

                                Trish

126 Rest in Peace

Rest in Pease, 2016

Dear Friends (aka blog readers), 2016 is almost over. 

Frankly, I wish it would hurry up. I want the clock and calendar to read 2017 with hope for peace and wisdom in a new year. 

The reflections at the end of the year make me remember my mother (you know--the one the minister called “our own Bea Arthur” at her funeral) who, in her late 70s and 80s said her new hobby was attending funerals. In her 90s, she gave them up. “Just too tired of black,” she said.

I am thinking she was exactly right as I read the many lists of those who have died this year. No, I was not invited to any of these funerals, but the deaths of these famous folk leave both a legacy and a void in their chosen fields. In my mind, I’ve created my own funeral service.

Begin with the religious leader giving a greeting to those attending and giving words of grace. This is where I ask you to go to YouTube or Pandora or wherever you listen to music for free and pull up Leonard Cohen’s (1934-2016) “Hallelujah.” 

This song is, to me, the nearest to a hymn written in modern times. Next think of familiar prayers and scripture. Each death will have its own eulogy. Then close with the last song Leonard Cohen, aged 82, produced just before his death this fall. The song is called “Treaty.” Look for the string reprise/treaty as a string quartet plays the music, ending with the singer-songwriter’s own gravely words. This is on his last CD titled “You Want It Darker.”

If you don’t know his music, please give a listen. Predicting goose bumps.

While you listen to the glorious and dark words and music from Cohen, here is a gathered list of those who died in 2016. The names and notes are gathered from all over the internet, popular and news magazines, and from the NYTimes (my daily read).

January

David Bowie, musician, 69; Alan Rickman, actor (Harry Potter), 69; Rene Angelil, music manager and Celine Dion’s husband,73; Dan Haggerty, actor (Grizzly Adams), 74; Abe Vigoda, character actor (Barney Miller, The Godfather), 94; Paul Kantner, musician (Jefferson Airplane), 74; Glenn Frey (Eagles co-founder- think “Hotel California”), 67; Georgia Davis Powers, first African-American woman in Kentucky’s state senate and served for over 20 years, 92; Bill Johnson, Olympic skier, 55.

February

Maurice White, musician (Earth, Wind, & Fire founder), 74; Edgar Mitchell, astronaut Apollo 14, 85; Antonin Scalia, U. S. Supreme Court, 79; Boutros Boutros-Ghali, Egyptian U.N. secretary-general, 93; Harper Lee , author (To Kill a Mockingbird), 89; George Kennedy, Academy Award actor, 91; Umberto Eco, author (The Name of the Rose).

March

Pat Conroy, Southern author (The Prince of Tides), 70; Nancy Reagan, first lady, 94; George Martin, music producer of the Beatles, 90; Frank Sinatra, Jr, singer, 72; Rob Ford, troubled Toronto mayor, 46; Joe Garagiola, baseball player and announcer, 90; Bud Collins, tennis commentator, 86; Garry Shandling, comic, 66; Earl Hamner, Jr., Virginia author (The Waltons), 92; Patty Duke, actor, 69.

April

Merle Haggard, country singer, 79; Doris Roberts, actor (mom on Everybody Loves Raymond), 90; Chyna, pro-wrestler and reality star, 46; Prince, singer, 57.

May

Morley Safer, 60 Minutes reporter, 84; Alan Young, actor (“Mr.Ed”), 90.

June

Muhammad Ali, boxing champion, 74; Gordie Howe, “Mr. Hockey," 88; Pat Summitt, women’s basketball coach at Tennessee, 64; Michael Herr, screenplays (Apocalypse Now), 76. Bill Cunningham, NYTimes photographer, 87; Buddy Ryan, NFL coach (Bears), 82; Alvin Toffler, author (Future Shock), 87.

July

Elie Wiesel, humanitarian and holocaust survivor, 87; Sydney Schanberg, NYTimes Pulitzer-winning reporter (Killing Fields), 82; Youree Harris, actress/psychic Miss Cleo, 53; Garry Marshall, tv writer/director (Happy Days, Odd Couple, etc.), 81.

August

Pete Fountain, jazz clarinetist, 86; Harry Briggs, Jr., center of the lawsuit that outlawed segregated public schools, 75; Lou Pearlman, boy band producer (NSync) and convicted Ponzi schemer, 62; Kenny Baker, actor, voice of R2-D2, 81; John McLaughlin, conservative tv show host, 89; Sonia Rykiel, French designer whose sweaters helped replace suits for working women, 86; Gene Wilder, actor/comedian, 83.

September

Hugh O’Brian, actor (Wyatt Earp), 91; Phyllis Schiafly, conservative commentator created with defeating the Equal Rights Amendment, 92; Lady Chablis, transgender performer (The Garden of Good and Evil), 59; Arnold Palmer, golf, 87; Shimon Peres, former Israeli president and prime minister, Nobel prize winner, 93; Edward Albee, Pulitzer-prize playwright (…Virginia Woolf), 88; Jose Fernandez, baseball, outstanding rookie pitcher Marlins, 24.

October

Dennis Byrd, NFL, 51; Tom Hayden, 1960s antiwar activist (ex-wife Jane Fonda), 76; Bobby Vee, pop singer of the 1960s, 73; King Bhumibol Adulyadej, Thailand (longest reigning monarch), 88.

November

Janet Reno, first woman U.S. attorney general, 78; Leonard Cohen, singer-songwriter, 82; Grant Tinker, TV/NBC chairman, 90; Robert Vaughn, actor, 83; Gwen Hill, co-anchor of PBS NewsHour, moderator of v-p debates, 61; Ralph Branca, Brooklyn Dodgers pitcher (look up baseball - “Shot Heard ‘Round the World” for a great story), 90; Florence Henderson, actor, 82; Fidel Castro, Cuban prime minister and president, 90.

AND FINALLY, December

Fulton Walker, NFL, 58; Joe McKnight, NFL, 28; Rashaan Salaam, NFL (Heisman winner), 42; Konrad Reuland, NFL, 29; Dennis Byrd, NFL, 50; Craig Sager, NBA reporter known for his flashy suits, 65; George Michael, singer, 53; Zsa Zsa Gabor, actor, 99; Henry Heimlich, surgeon, 96; Alan Thicke, actor, 69; John Glenn, astronaut and senator, 95; and Carrie Fisher, actor (Princess Leia) 60, and her mother, Debbie Reynolds, 84, the following day.

What a list, my friends! Farewell, 2016.

Stunned, but still a little bit savvy, Glenne