Directionally Challenged
Likely the day will come when Savvy Frances and Savvy Trish toss me out of Three Savvy Broads! I have NO sense of direction. North is up, south is down, west is left, and right is east.
That is all there is to it.
HA! This cluelessness about directions has nothing to do with getting older. I have always been this way! I must have north in front of me!
I need and want simple directions. Turn right, go one light. Turn left. The building is on the northeast corner. OH, FOR HEAVEN SAKE. Which corner is the northeast corner? I have NO CLUE. Give me a landmark. It’s the old brick building with the four white columns across from the gas station. Give me something. I have no innate sense of how to get to where I need to be without landmarks.
Yes, it is I who loves to drive in New York City. NYC is laid out in a grid. Streets are east and west. Avenues are north and south. Central Park is hard to miss. The East River is on the EAST SIDE of the island! So, the Hudson must be on the west side. Areas are called sensible names like midtown, upper eastside, westside, etc.
I can give tourists directions in NYC, but I can also try to leave a large department store and realize it’s not where I entered. I have to tell myself things like I came in by the perfume counter or I may have to rewalk the entire first floor of the store.
Ah, and here we are - luckily living only 70 miles from our nation’s capital. An easy hour and a half drive if one avoids rush hour. Out-of-town visitors often answer when asked what they would like to do, “go to D.C.” Okay, that’s fine.
Ah, and here we are - luckily living only 70 miles from our nation’s capital. An easy hour and a half drive if one avoids rush hour. Out-of-town visitors often answer when asked what they would like to do, “go to D.C.” Okay, that’s fine.
I can get into the city. I even know where some good parking spots are – usually, I park at Union Station. HOWEVER, I cannot get out of the Union Station parking garage in Washington, D.C. to get back to Virginia without getting lost two or three times. As I drive in circles down the parking ramps to wind my way to the station exit, I have lost any sense of direction I had. There used to be REAL HUMANS at the toll booths that would help you out. No more! Stick that credit card in the slot and go.
And, good grief, PLEASE NO requests that take one around a circle. Absolutely no circles. This is DuPont Circle around which I can go many times before I find where I need to be. D.C. looks so pretty on a map with its star of avenues, but it is extraordinarily difficult for me to maneuver. I always allow an extra half hour for “being lost” time.
Okay, here is my latest adventure. My sweet husband had to have emergency surgery at Johns Hopkins University Medical Center in Baltimore. One of the best rated medical institutions on the east coast.
Okay, here is my latest adventure. My sweet husband had to have emergency surgery at Johns Hopkins University Medical Center in Baltimore. One of the best rated medical institutions on the east coast.
HOWEVER, from Winchester, there are a number of routes to get there. Seems it didn’t matter which route was chosen, I still had to get on Interstate 695 and take exit something or other (I think 11) and head towards the Inner Harbor of Baltimore. Well, folks, there is MUCH construction happening on 695 and a detour when I took the (YES, the correct) exit according to Google and Waze. Then the directions, I kid you not, said “head northeast.” OKAY, that’s it! Pull over and try not to have an anxiety attack. Yep, I am lost.
Keep in mind, too, all the rain we have had in the past month. There are lots of trees in Baltimore. More than I had considered. Could I see the street signs? Some streets signs I never found. The leaves and branches hung over many of the signs.
Johns Hopkins is on the east side of the city. Somehow I ended up on the far west side in a neighborhood that did not look like a major medical center would be anywhere around. I pulled off in a “no parking” slot on a street and waited for a policeman. He was very nice, but he told me to reverse everything I had done and that would get to the east side of the city. THANKS, HEAPS! Betting he laughed all the way back to his station. Okay, I don’t even SEE my exit on this map with the title Baltimore & Johns Hopkins Hospital.
Both Google maps and Waze had given me the directions but it seems my Bluetooth in the car is synced with my phone and directions can get interrupted by phone calls and text messages. I had no idea this would happen. Call me naïve. Call me dumb. But, finally, 40 minutes later, now heading east (I hoped), I saw a hospital drop off circle that said “NO PARKING OR WAITING AT ANY TIME.” I crossed traffic lanes, with flashers on and a toot on the horn, received some unpleasant hand signals and horns from other drivers, and, yes, I pulled in and parked.
Poor husband, after three days in the hospital, was eager to get home. HOWEVER, seems the aide who took him from his room to the exit did NOT use the same exit I was given by phone of where to pick him up. Thank goodness for cell phones. After he and I talked, a security guard gave him directions of how to get where I was. HE GOT OUT HIS WHEELCHAIR and HE walked to meet me! [Had he passed out or fallen, I believe a lawsuit might have been in the works.]
Now here’s the rub! I turn out of the parking lot and start looking for the cross street that we were told would lead us to 70 West to come home. I have yet to find the street! However, dear husband, whose sense of direction is quite good, calmly says, “just keep
Both Google maps and Waze had given me the directions but it seems my Bluetooth in the car is synced with my phone and directions can get interrupted by phone calls and text messages. I had no idea this would happen. Call me naïve. Call me dumb. But, finally, 40 minutes later, now heading east (I hoped), I saw a hospital drop off circle that said “NO PARKING OR WAITING AT ANY TIME.” I crossed traffic lanes, with flashers on and a toot on the horn, received some unpleasant hand signals and horns from other drivers, and, yes, I pulled in and parked.
Poor husband, after three days in the hospital, was eager to get home. HOWEVER, seems the aide who took him from his room to the exit did NOT use the same exit I was given by phone of where to pick him up. Thank goodness for cell phones. After he and I talked, a security guard gave him directions of how to get where I was. HE GOT OUT HIS WHEELCHAIR and HE walked to meet me! [Had he passed out or fallen, I believe a lawsuit might have been in the works.]
Now here’s the rub! I turn out of the parking lot and start looking for the cross street that we were told would lead us to 70 West to come home. I have yet to find the street! However, dear husband, whose sense of direction is quite good, calmly says, “just keep
driving, you will run into Route 40 and we can take 81 home.” Well, he was correct. And we did get home and I finally peeled my fingers off the steering wheel in my driveway.
One last admission to my directional ineptness: if directions take me outside of the 22601 city zip code of our hometown, I can still get lost. Yep, right here at home. No winding streets, please!!
OH, give me NYC grids!!
One last admission to my directional ineptness: if directions take me outside of the 22601 city zip code of our hometown, I can still get lost. Yep, right here at home. No winding streets, please!!
OH, give me NYC grids!!
I can relate to this story. I bought a compass for my older model car so would know how to follow turn NW, etc., directions.
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